Diabetes Cruise and a Lesson in Debate Class

Diabetes Cruise

It's exciting to announce that on December 1, 2008 we will set sail from the port of Miami on the first Gary Hall Jr. Foundation Diabetes Cruise.

We are chartering the Carnival ship M/S Destiny and will provide an atmosphere where those with diabetes can come into contact with others living with this disease and a comprehensive team of specialists, doctors, presenters and educators that will provide the latest and greatest in diabetes management tools and techniques, nutrition, exercise, and medication information.

A cruise provides a relaxed atmosphere where patients can learn, interact and enjoy with their family an exciting adventure through the Caribbean. Prices are reasonable and rooms are going fast so sign up now if you or someone you know is interested.

You don't have to have diabetes to go. If you want to support the Gary Hall Jr. Foundation attending a cruise is a pretty stylish way to. Go Live It!

Click here to read the full press release.




On the 10th of December my wife gave birth to our second child. Everyone is healthy and happy. The name was chosen to honor my grandfather, Charlie Keating. We had a middle name picked out, Busby, that we changed at the very last second.

I have to admit. I saw on a swim site a while back that Joe Hudepohl (Olympian 1992, 1996) had a son whose middle name was Jameson. My wife's brother is James. I drink more Jameson than the island of Ireland. For those that don't know Jameson is a traditional Irish Catholic libation. Joe, I hope you're not mad at me for stealing your son's middle name, but.

The Gary Hall Jr. Rant on Deck Pass

Check out the new Gary Hall Jr. rant on Deck Pass www.deckpass.com

Well, for those of you that subscribe to this newsletter it isn't exactly new. You read about the "Pep Talk" in my last Aqua Notes. Seeing as how I am kind of busy working on stuff like the Diabetes Cruise while training for the Olympic Games I plan to sample bits and pieces from The Race Club content so that I am able to contribute on a regular basis to the Deck Pass show.

New Fodder For My Rant Gun/ An Argument of Why I Should Get Some Crazy Money That Could Be Course Material In Any Debate Class

For five days in December Art Basel (pronounced Bashole) took over Miami Beach and brought with it many incredible pieces of art and a crowd any sensible human being would consider drowning. The "art" crowd is the most preposterous group that you could ever hope to NOT meet. Self important with the characteristics of a retarded chicken is how I have come to describe this group.

If I ever hear the word, "Eclectic" again I'm going to stick a toothbrush so far up my nose I'll be able to wear the bristles as a ridiculous false mustache, which should top off perfectly the ridiculous "arty" costume that I have put together to advertise to everyone else just how "eclectic" I really am.

The first thing you notice when you enter the convention is the amount of people. Then my eyes jump from a Richard Prince to a Botero. As I fall into the slow flow of people moving about I catch a dirty glance. Then another. Then another. Then I start checking everything. Is my fly down? Is my beret on crooked or something? Or did one of the lenses pop out of my sunglasses? Everyone has the same expression!

But then you realize that the looks aren't really dirty looks at all but rather a look of conceited constipation. This year there were 43,000 people that paid US $30 to curl their lips at each other. A new RECORD!

Walking through the great hall and seeing some incredible art I notice some of the idle chatter that surrounds. It's mostly namedropping. And then a flashback to that boring, familiar talk that we all were hearing about real estate prices a couple years back, except this time it's about art.

The talk is about how much this piece is worth, how much this artist is selling for. Who's hot right now and how much their pieces are going for and who's not hot right now and how much their pieces are going for. Appreciation is being discussed but it's not talk about brush strokes or color palates, it's monetary.

Last year a number of hedge fund managers came in and bought almost the whole show. And why not? The high end art market has appreciated more than my stock portfolio. Recently a Jeff Koons (a living artist) piece sold for close to US $24 million.

Review of the year: Art sales

Why am I going on about art for so long in a swim related newsletter? Art seemed to me to be removed from the grip of the mighty Canadian dollar, or what used to be the US dollar. Money is what I'm saying. Money makes the world go round.

Whether we like it or not we are judged by how much we make. Argue with me on this and you are disillusioned. I am not saying that there is nothing more important than money but it is true that society, that roaming mass of retarded chickens, judges us by our wealth.

Here is a perfect example. Matt Damon. He's a good looking guy. I'm so much better looking than him, and athletic. He makes a lot more money than me and gets the nod for sexiest man alive. Apparently having money has something to do with being sexy? Oh well on that!

If we as a sport are ever going to gain the interest of the common chicken we must figure out "a way to pay". Say it with me, "A way to pay."

Work has nothing to do with it. Of course we could argue all day long that even with the amount that our top earners make it works out to about US $2.60 an hour if you add up the number of hours spent to reach their level, justifying the salaries within the sport. But there is no logic here in the Art Bashole convention center and good riddance! Everybody here is getting RICH!

Jeff Koons came up with an idea to suspend a nine foot stainless heart from the ceiling with a bow. And then that was pretty much it. He didn't actually go out and sculpt the thing. He probably oversaw the handing of the piece of paper with his sketch on it from his assistant to the foundry, then viola, US $23 million and change. Oh, that "change" is US $600,000, a hefty sum for even the best in our sport.

Money fascinates people. Jeff's next piece will probably sell for significantly more, with twice as many lined up to pay it. The articles, talk and publicity aren't about how brilliant these pieces are but rather how brilliant the sums of crazy money are that exchange hands.

I have no intention of explaining this madness. As an observer I think that we need to try this approach in marketing our sport. Let's pay the top athletes in our sport, myself even more so, crazy money and see what happens.

Again, "a way to pay".

It's not just the artist and athlete that profit. Art dealers and coaches profit. Collectors and fans that invest profit too. All ships rise with the tide.

Ironically, I heard that the guy who bought the Jeff Koons piece was his art dealer. The value of his massive collection of Jeff Koons art just skyrocketed with the publicity and title "highest priced artist". He is sure to make more than US $24 million off of the increase in the rest of his collection even if he can't sell the heart thing for more than the price he bought it for.

Imagine. If you have US $25 million dollars to spend on your own client's piece of art which results in everything that he produces for the rest of his life selling for a mere US $1 million, instead of a scant US $50,000 per piece. You could stand to make hundreds of millions.

Which brings me to my point. United States Swimming has so much to gain by paying their athletes, especially me. The more USS pays the more they stand to make. All ships rise with the tide.

It's logic. Counterpoint is futile. Surrender. United States Swimming should make checks payable to Gary Hall Jr. Inc.

If you haven't already checked out our new clothing line and suits, visit our estore!

Swim Camps

There are a couple spots left for the holiday training camp season so sign up now before they are gone. We keep the number of campers to a minimum so that everyone gets the attention that they need. Once the spots are gone, they're gone. Please do not inquire about joining an already full camp. Thanks.

Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Your friend in swimming,
And the greatest living artist,
And debate class hero,

AND THE MEEKEST MAN IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!!!

Gary Hall Jr.